Icon For Hire: Only a Memory Meaning

Song Released: 2011

Only a Memory Lyrics

I can't help but close my eyes for life
And dream a different ending
That when I wake, I won't be so exhausted
And I will stop with my pretending
That I'm fine, I'm fine if I can fool myself tonight
And my lie will drown out all of...

1. anonymous

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   Oct 31st 2017 !⃝

   This song is about abuse. Ariel stated that this song was extremely hard and scary to write because it related to someone close to them who was sexually abused. This song is about letting go of the past and the abuse you may have endured, and not letting it take over your life.
2. anonymous

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   Mar 20th 2015 !⃝

   its about depression and how she's not letting depression control her and its just a memory of her depression and how its not going to stop her from finding happiness.
3. clarissa.dupuis

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   Dec 30th 2014 !⃝

   For me, it can mean two people who hurt me: my real father and the devil. I'm fighting both of them pretty hard. I was hurt bad by my father. He called me bad names because I joked about something that I probably shouldn't of. But, it resulted in us ending our relationship. I am more hurt by it then I tell others. I tell others that it was God's intention, I believe, and I'm okay with it because he was a crappy father anyways..blah blah blah. But, in all reality, I'm not okay with it. Even though he was a crappy father to me, there is a part of me that still loves him, that wants to have that musical relationship at least, but we won't because we both messed up. This song makes me want to cry..knowing the meaning behind it all. It's almost like it's speaking what I am thinking. It's crazy.
4. haven.mcgregor.9

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   Nov 9th 2014 !⃝

   This song has a very deep emotional meaning in my case. I will write the meaning verse by verse.
   
   "I can't help but close my eyes for life
   And dream a different ending
   That when I wake, I won't be so exhausted
   And I will stop with my pretending
   That I'm fine, I'm fine if I can fool myself tonight
   And my lie will drown out all of yours."
   
   The narrator is in a very difficult situation, and wishes that they could change what's happening, wishes that they could magically poof away the suffering and depression. They also wish that they could explain everything that's happening within them to the people around them instead of just saying they're fine.
   
   "I will not bend until I break
   How much can one bruised body take?
   Just not enough to silence me
   You're only a memory
   I'll scream these words 'til they come true
   Then I will think no more of you
   Look back on what I'm going through
   This isn't my identity."
   
   This is the narrator's refusal to give in to the depression they are feeling, but also wondering how much their already damaged body and soul can take. They say that no matter how hard this depression beats them, they won't be silent, that the person who has hurt them is only a memory, not something to dwell on. There is also some self-convincing that needs to be done, screaming these words in their head until it comes true, and the person who harmed them is truly only a memory. What they're going through, all the pain and suffering, isn't who they are. They're so much more than that.
   
   "You will bleed for what your hands have done
   You can't outrun your ending
   And I'll get well long before you let yourself
   I may forgive you but you never will."
   
   This is the narrator stating that the person who hurt them will suffer for what they have done, but not by the narrator's hands. The person will suffer because of their own guilt, once they realize how much they've hurt the narrator. The narrator may forgive them, but they will never forgive themselves for putting the narrator through so much suffering.
   
   "And I told you, I told you, you had no right
   How damaged you must be
   Watch you panic, it's tragic, you'll carry this for life
   You have my sympathy."
   
   The narrator is telling this person that they had no right to make the narrator suffer the way they did, and that they must be damaged to think that it was okay. The narrator is watching this person panic now, realizing the situation they're in, the guilt and also no longer being able to harm the narrator. They will carry this burden for the rest of their life.
   
   To me personally, this song is about my ex-stepfather, who stopped speaking to me July 2014, and moved out of the house about a week ago, in late October 2014. He gave up on me because I had been doing a lot of bad things, like stealing property multiple times, not doing what I was supposed to (in his mind), and just not being good enough for him, those his standards were so high that not even he himself could achieve them. He gave up on me after eight years of being my only father (as my biological father and I sort of drifted apart, though we're drifting back together again.) It is difficult dealing with the added depression and anxiety, especially when my little brother is his son, and my brother is also suffering. This song has a very deep meaning to me, and it makes me sob almost every time I listen to it, but it also empowers. I refuse to bend or break because of him. I will not let his opinions and expectations of me bring me down. He thinks that because he's gone, my grades will slip and I will fail school. I will not give him the satisfaction. I will do what I need to for me and only me, not because of him. I will not let him drag me down with him.
5. anonymous

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   Jun 30th 2014 !⃝

   When I hear the song, it makes me think of the time when my ex had beat the crap out of me for the last time. The lines "how much can one bruised body take?" and "You will bleed for what your hands have done" makes it seem like abuse is the key there. So I feel like its saying that just because you were hurt you and broke you down, that you don't have to be broken or let it define who you are. And that the best thing you can do is forgive them because there is no use in holding on to resentment, plus the fact they will never forgive themselves is punishment enough
6. Leberist

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   Jul 18th 2012 !⃝

   This song relates to one of the band's major themes in writing music: depression. "Only a Memory" is a song that describes something that has happened in the narrator's past, that she will not let become her present. The event was traumatic and probably induced depression in the narrator's life but she defies it's hardship by claiming that it is "only a memory, this isn't my identity." This song is a message to everyone who's ever let something in their past devastate their present.

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