Nirvana: All Apologies Meaning

Song Released: 1993

All Apologies Lyrics

What else should I be
All apologies
What else could I say
Everyone is gay
What else could I write
I don't have the RIGHT
What else should I be
All apologies

In the sun
In the sun I feel as one
In the sun
In the...

1. anonymous

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   Jan 22nd 2011 !⃝

   In my opinion I think the song may mean that he wishes he could be happy like everyone else instead of feeling depressed. Or it may mean that the song has to do with his girlfriend doing drugs. So the title of the song all apologies is referring to himself and his girlfriend. This is what this song means to me.
2. anonymous

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   Nov 15th 2010 !⃝

   The idea that this was written for Courtney and Frances and/or as an apology to the fans is a popular theory, but a version of "All Apologies" was actually written and recorded back in January of '91 - albeit with different lyrics. IIRC this was before he met Courtney. It's possible that "All Apologies" was written to be a different song entirely (the early version is much more upbeat) and re-purposed to be a tribute to his wife and child.
3. shanon2885

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   Jun 14th 2010 !⃝

   This song was indeed written to Courtney and frances. Kurt was planning on divorcing Courtney and taking full custody of frances as he and Courtney fought constantly (violently) and he had found out about numerous affairs Courtney was having, including with smashing pumpkins billy corgan. Kurt felt overwhelmed with trying to mend his marriage, raise his daughter, and carry on a career he no longer had passion for. It is rumored in the Kurt Cobain murder theory that his "suicide note" was in fact a retirement letter from rock to his fans. RIP KURT
4. anonymous

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   Jan 2nd 2010 !⃝

   "all in all" is a conclusion or a way to sum things up. In life terms, our conclusion is our death. Perhaps Kurt was foretelling his legacy after death. A lot of people that never listened to Kurt's music know about his death. To them, "all in all" was all he was.
5. anonymous

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   Dec 29th 2009 !⃝

   Jude 1:12
   
   Raging waves of the sea, foaming out their own shame; wandering stars, to whom is reserved the blackness of darkness for ever.
   
   All APOLOGIES
   
   I'll take all the blame , aqua sea foam shame
6. anonymous

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   Oct 5th 2009 !⃝

   I think some people are reading too much into the lyrics. This song is most likely just explaining how he feels ( I remember hearing that he had manic depression), So this could be about his lows. He feels like anything bad that happens is his fault, that he loses passion in life, for his music.
7. anonymous

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   Aug 5th 2009 !⃝

   I disagree with the people that say all Kurt's song had meanings... I remember him stating in an interview that some of his songs had no true meaning, they were bits of poetry and things he enjoyed. He stated his appreciation for music with strange and bizarre music, comparing it much to abstract art... stating it was unique, and beautiful. Kurt was a very misunderstood, his lyrics were genius.
8. anonymous

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   Jun 22nd 2009 !⃝

   This song was written as demonstration of Kurt's love for candy corn. (I don't care much for it myself) but Kurt sure as hell did! He chewed on that stuff everywhere he went, to the guitar store, at the Grammys, he even ate it in the shower. All the time!
9. Dreamerswrite

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   Jun 22nd 2009 !⃝

   What else should I be
   All apologies
   
   **He doesn’t know what he should be other than what he is, which is “conflicted” so he apologizes to himself for wanting to commit suicide.
   
   
   What else should I say
   Everyone is gay
   
   **He can’t come to terms with the fact that everyone has duality in themselves, and are conflicted. He has good and bad in him and feels happy on the drug, while sad when straight. He thinks that everyone is gay (happy) but he is depressed so he doesn’t know how to deal with the mood swings. Here he is making a pun on words; gay and straight. Also, happy (gay) straight (has his act together and not on the drug)
   
   What else could I write
   I don't have the right
   What else should I be
   All apologies
   
   **He doesn’t know how else to convey his issues or problems honestly. He doesn’t feel that he has the right to express himself due to society holding men to a standard of being strong, and holding their emotions in, while woman let their emotions go. Because he is emotional he thinks people might think he is gay even though he isn’t. So he apologizes to himself and others for making that judgment, in that gay men are allowed to express their emotions without ridicule while if he did the same he would be wrong. Therefore he doesn’t know if he is right or wrong in his thought process?
   
   In the sun
   In the sun I feel as one
   In the sun
   In the sun
   
   **Most spiritual people feel that everything in the universe makes up the whole, but in the same instance are separate. So here he feels the “colloid quartz” (which represents him) is part of the whole (the salts - Amphetamines, the sea, the chemicals, AND the particles that need to be removed from his body to make him think “clear” like the crystal he really knows he is.)
   
   **Also, colloid suspensions are intermediate between homogeneous and heterogeneous mixtures. Heterogeneous is consisting of dissimiliar or diverse ingrediants or constituents, while homogeneous is of uniform stucture or composition throughout. He doesn’t know if the way he feels is normal.
   
   I'm married
   buried
   
   **Burying something is an unwillingness to deal with whatever that object represents, which could be the whole universe, the quartz metaphor that he uses to represent himself, or the drugs.
   
   **Marriage represents two things or people coming together to make one “whole”. He doesn’t think he will ever be whole because he is conflicted in the way he feels about life. He wonders if he belongs to the universe as a whole, or if he is separate, or maybe both, which is driving him crazy because he can’t figure it out.
   
   
   I wish I was like you
   Easily amused
   
   **Amphetamine salts are used for ADHD. So he probably was very focused or an obsessive thinker, which can lead to madness. Usually people with ADHD are easily amused and distracted from life’s difficulties. He feels the salts, “are what they are”, and don’t think, so he feels they are amused. He just wants to be like the drug itself so he can relax. Another metaphor because one can’t relax on stimulant salts.
   
   Find my nest of salt
   Everything is my fault
   
   **Seawater consists of salt. The nest could be his mind. When mixed with amphetamine salts along with heroin it creates an easy feeling, like being at home with yourself. The addiction and confliction - Mixing uppers and downers probably by injection. This is becoming a habit and he apologizes for not being able to deal with his afflictions on his own.
   
   **Anatase (sometimes known by the obsolete name 'octahedrite'), a tetragonal mineral of pseudo-octahedral means HABBIT
   http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rutile
   
   **The Irish word for quartz is grian cloch, which means 'stone of the sun'.
   Other sources insist the name is from the Saxon word Querkluftertz", meaning cross- VEIN- ore . Mixing uppers and downers in the vein.
   http://pubs.acs.org/doi/abs/10.1021/la981608c
   
   **Colloid is a particile that won't disolve. Micron-sized particles adhering to collector surfaces can be detached by passing a liquid air interface over the adhering particles. Theoretically, the efficiency of particle detachment depends on the interface velocity, the liquid surface tension, the viscosity, and the particle substratum interaction forces. In this study we perfuse an air bubble through a parallel-plate flow chamber to study detachment of polystyrene particles from a quartz collector surface, at different interface velocities and liquid surface tensions and upon multiple air bubble passages. A linear relation was found between particle removal and the liquid air interface velocity, with negligible removal at elevated velocities. Linear relations were also found between particle removal and the liquid air surface tensions, with different slopes for different air bubble velocities. Particle removal could be increased by the passage of multiple air bubbles. In summary, this study shows that liquid air interfaces can be employed to detach micron-sized particles from collector surfaces. The detachment process can be optimized by adjusting the air bubble velocities, the surface tensions, and the number of bubbles applied.
   
   
   I'll take all the blame
   Aqua seafoam shame
   
   **Aqua is Latin for water.
   Seafoam creates colloidal quartz, which is a particle in quartz crystals that is removed to make the crystal quartz clear. Because he has particles (a chemical imbalance in his body, he feels ashamed)
   
   **Sunburn with freezerburn
   The Irish word for quartz is grian cloch, which means 'stone of the sun'.
   
   **Roman naturalist Pliny the Elder believed quartz to be 'water ice', permanently frozen after great lengths of time. Here he is expressing his mood swings. Detaching and feeling cold, and then using drugs to feel warm and happy, yet he knows both burns and eventually he will remain cold and detached.
   
   Choking on the ashes of her enemy
   All in all is all we are
   
   **Chocking by trying to communicate from the place within himself where he doesn’t understand life, due to the degeneration from his enemy (drugs)(chemicals)(substances) He can’t communicate his thoughts freely (openly and honestly) so he apologizes for using metaphors.
   
   All in all is all we are. I believe he feels insignificant due to his chemical imbalance that causes mood swings and he looses faith in himself.
10. anonymous

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    May 15th 2009 !⃝

    Ive listened to this song many many times before.. and always thought the same old things as to what the meaning was. But there is something deeper.. I've realised u have to look very deeply into his music to truely understand what he's talking about.
    
    I believe Kurt Cobains mind had been "fugged up" by drugs.. Now i say screwed up but is that really the case? Much like the song Dumb, Kurt's mind is stuck in a continuous loop trying to formulate infinity. So when Kurt said his lyrics mean nothing he's talking in riddles. He talks in riddles alot.
    
    "all in all is all we are" When i found myself trying to formulate and work out the point to everything i found myself coming to this same conclusion.
    
    A lot of people dont realise it but Kurt Cobain was that intelligent that he got to a point where he thought he was dumb. Perhaps thats why we humans only use 10% of our brain??
11. anonymous

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    Apr 23rd 2009 !⃝

    I always thought he said "I'll proceed from shame" instead of "Aqua seafoam shame," which seems fucking random. Are you guys sure he isn't saying "I'll proceed from shame?" I keep trying to listen for both lyics, but it's hard to draw a conclusion.
12. anonymous

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    Apr 15th 2009 !⃝

    That last anonymous guy I'm afraid is so off, if he wanted to kill himself, then wrote a song about being unable only to, why would he then kill himself less than a year later?
13. anonymous

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    Feb 18th 2009 !⃝

    its about how he wants to die but cant because he is "married...buried" and cant kill himself because courtney and frances need him. "sunburn and freezerburn" sound like "someday free as a bird" when he sang live for mtv. suicide for him was a way to be free from all the media and pain and addiction.
14. yeaitsfingme

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    Sep 16th 2008 !⃝

    Umm to me it means being really ashamed of who you are. and you feel like no one really gets it or understands and you think well know its your fault that they don't. and your really sad cause nothing funny anymore more and you never really feel complete cause you're so ashamed around people.
15. REMareback

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    Sep 12th 2008 !⃝

    All of you who think this is about Frances and Courtney are wrong, and those who think because it says 'married buried' it relates to his death are also wrong.
    It was written well before the release of In Utero, and a long time before his death.
    This song is about a gay guy, who is essentially saying sorry for being himself, so Kurt is mocking people who dislike Gays, for being who they are.
    Kurt has always stuck up for gay people, he had a gay friend at high school, which led everyone to think he was gay. He also said he sometimes wished he was gay, so he could 'piss off homophobes'

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