Nirvana: Lithium Meaning
Song Released: 1992
Lithium Lyrics
They're in my head. I'm so ugly. But that's ok.
'Cause so are you. We've broke our mirrors.
Sunday morning. Is everyday for all I care.
And I'm not scared. Light my candles. In a daze cause I've...
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"OMG, how can you not say that he didn't kill himshelf . The man was deeply depressed. He did try to kill himshlef before with a bottle of champagne and pain killers. The man was not happy. HE WAS NOT MURDERED. ARGGH..."
It's much more easier to say he killed himself when has obviously depressed, whereas if did, they would have found his finger prints on the shot gun! It is MUCH easier to cover the fact that Courtney blew his brains out! -
To understand the songs of Kurt, you all should read all the books that have been written about him...
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Kurt has lived for a short period with a friend
(In 1985)
That friend, Jesse Reed, was still living with his parents. Dave Reed, the father of Jesse, remembers that he was disgusted by Cobain's behavior in his eyes was more or less "a parody of an insufferable pop star",Jessica's mother even called him" sick "
The family gave Cobain food and shelter for weeks and they were only that he had to give "some attention" devoted to his appearance and that he must have respect for their Christian beliefs.
About this two demands, he would write satirical outlets later in 'lithium'.
(Kurt Cobain, by Christopher Sandford) -
Ok, it can be both about bipolar disorder but it is also about Christianity in a way.
-"Light my candles in a daze because I found god"
As in how they light the candles in church
-"Sunday morning, is every day for all I care"
Sunday mornings are church days, and he's saying it could be everyday for all he cares.
-"I'm so horny, but that's ok my will is good"
As in guilty priests that rape innocent children, but saying its ok because "god forgives them"
-"I'm so exciting, I can't wait to meet you there"
Meeting "god" in heaven
-Not to offend Christians btw-
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I think the song is about a person with a bi polar disorder suffering from depression with feelings of having no purpose in life. Great song I have the same experiences as Kurt so I can relate to his pain that he felt. We all need to be loved and to feel wanted So I think that is what he needed in his life.
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He wrote this as a reference to a time when he lived with a family that was way into religion.
"The family nonetheless fed and housed Cobain for weeks, insisting only that he pay 'scant attention' to his appearence and respect their Christian beliefs, both requests he would later satirize in 'Lithium'."
Took that expert from "Kurt Cobain" A Biography by Christopher Sanford. -
Definetely go along with the 'finding God' interpretation of the lyrics, as the words cause i found God are fairly explicit. i feel like Kurt is voicing someones attempt to keep strong and in control with religion, as is a little sarcastic of this. I'm so lonely, that's ok
"I shaved my head
And I'm not sad
And just maybe
I'm to blame for all I've heard
I'm not sure
I'm so excited
I can't wait to meet you there
And I don't care
I'm so horny, that's okay
My will is good"
Shaving the hair, whether a short hair cut for a Christian group or completely shaven for an Eastern religion. Deciding you are no longer sad because possibly one is to blame for the things that have occured in one's childhood or hurts in ones life, perhaps because one is a sinner, so one gives up the rage. Excited to meet people at the ashram or church and trying to say how great it is and convert others. The person considers they like sex but with the rules of the church or ashram they can cope cos they have will power and can repress the need for sex.
It then expresses the total emotion of someone desperately trying to hold their life together, and if religion can help they will hold on to try to cope. -
i believe that this is kurt trying to explain how his own bipolar disorder made it very difficult in belieiving god.
"Im so ugly. but thats ok. Cause so are you. weve broke our mirrors." Kurt sees himself as bad in general, but its alright though because he sees god as the same way as himself.
"sunday morning every day" line all has to do with his excitement he found god again. Also mentioning hes not scared, because faith would mean an afterlife, rather than...nothing.
"Im so lonely." - (lost faith that day) and thats ok because today. (bipolar disorder kicking in)
I shaved my head.and just maybe. Im to blame foR all ive heard. (questioning his faith) and im not sure.(cant decide)
and im so excited. i cant wait to meet you there. and i dont care. im so horny. but thats ok. my will is good."
(all speaking about himself following faith. (not having sex because he has good will power)
the chorus comes in with his other wiew of his own faith.
I like it. -kurt likes the idea of faith.
I miss you.-kurt misses having faith.
I love you. he loes the idea of faith...
I killed you. He doesnt believe in faith. -
My Interpritation and just some basic facts of life and psyco analysis are one, Almost every one can be diagnosied with Bi polar exspecially a drug abuser I kno from experience. 2, Im not a medical doctor of any kind but I would say that Kurt Cobain would meet the proper creteria to be diagnoised with Bi polar disorder wheater he was like that from childhood or the Drugs influenced his mind to become bi polar is really any ones guess. I would theroize that this song is about His personal life experiences but the part of the song that really gets me is "I light my candels in a daze because I found god" It seems to me and this is only one mans opion is that he is talking about the effects of drowsiness and and complete for fillment that heroin makes a person feel and it was often related to not only my self but to other addicts that shooting herion was in a senes finding GOD that is only my opion I guess people could sit here and theorize the meaning of Kurts songs but the only people who may no are Kurt and the ones close to him
Anthony -
I think it is deeper than just being about bi-polar disorder. I think it has to do with the thought that we are all one. One consciousness observing itself or God as some might say. When he says all his friends are in his head, he is saying that his friends are just mirrors of himself and that they are just as much art of him as he is. He goes on to say that he found God (the idea of infinite interconnectedness). It is called lithium because this idea can make you feel crazy and make you lose your grip on reality ("im not gonna crack"). Basically life becomes a dream and that can make anyone feel crazy.
Just a thought. One Love. -
Hi, here is my interpretation:
I´am bipolar on my own. If bipolar persons use much drugs, the manic episodes become psychotic. what then happens nobody who didn`t had one can ever emagine. every line of Kurt I can underline and it is out of question that he had made this experiences.
I'm so happy 'cause today
I've found my friends
They're in my head
--if you forget to take your lithium (or other stabilizers) you get into trouble because you can get an episode. So he is happy when he doesn't forget to take the pills.
I'm so ugly, but that's okay, 'cause so are you
--if you are manic, your thoughts become very quick one after another that you can't fix simple thoughts like what time it is or if you took a shower or brushed your teeths - you become ugly.
We've broken our mirrors
--in a psychotic episode you destroy many things (like mirrors), because you think tey are irrelevant.
sunday morning is everyday for all I care
--in an manic episode you nearly don´t sleep. In the end your body doesn`t make it any longer and you are down like on sunday morning after an exhausting week.
And I'm not scared
--you have no fear of nothing. bipolar persons dy by suicide or ACCIDENTS.
Cause I've found god
--thats one mane symptom: you think you have found god and he has chosen you to make his will happen on earth. That's because your brain has ultimate power. you thik extremely quick and you see every analogy in everthing. you recognise, that nobody can think so quick and is nearly as creative as you are.
now the depressiv part begins:
I'm so lonely but that's okay I shaved my head
--typicly depressiv. you think you are lonely and you have no self-confidence. you try to find reasons why you can't go out on the street (shaved my head)-i did it too
And just maybe I'm to blame for all I've heard
--typically too: you think you are blame for everything especially for your own crises.
I'm so excited, I can't wait to meet you there
--the typical wish to do suicide. With "you" he thinks about god.
... -
Simply see "Pennyroyal tea"
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I personally think that this song may not only be about bipolar disorder, but also Kurt Cobain's addiction to heroin. It fits perfectly with the lyrics and melody of the song: intense highs and even darker lows. Lines like " I found God", are simply metephorical; representing how drugs become your only thing to live for. Yes, Lithium may be a treatment for mental illness, but I think that addiction is moreso the subject here. Feel free to disagree though!
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Alright. I adore Nirvana; and Kurt Cobain's death was the first highly publicized celebrity death I recall hearing of when I was just 10 years old. However, while everyone here can fight to the death if they please as to whether he was suffered from Bipolar Disorder or not, his psychiatric drug history or lack of, what exactly was going through his mind when he died... I don't believe that any of those things are mandatory in order to interpret this song.
This song is about "Lithium," as in lithium carbonate (a salt), a drug used most commonly to treat Bipolar Disorder, otherwise known as Manic-Depression, & ocassionally other psychiatric conditions.
I have been diagnosed Bipolar I at times & Bipolar II at others (yes, there is a difference.) Psychiatrists often can't make up their minds & many psychiatric disorders are mistaken for others, & many co-occur with one another (ie: Borderline Personality Disorder, Schizo-affective Disorder, even Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, etc.) I have taken Lithium for a long period of time AND have recently gone through horrendous withdrawals from Lithium when I chose to go off of it. I know what it is like to be Manic, Hypomanic, Depressed, Suicidal, & withdrawing from Lithium. There is no doubt that this song is about the psychiatric drug Lithium Carbonate regardless of whether Cobain himself was diagnosed with the disorder or not, or whether took Lithium or not.
Just because I have Bipolar Disorder, have taken Lithium, & enjoy this song & Nirvana in general, does not mean I'm claiming to be god & will not claim to know exactly what this song is about. Only Cobain himself knew what it was about when he wrote it. This is after all about "interpretation" not "knowing" what the song is about.
However, I can make some of my own interpretations based upon my own experience, & can readily agree or disagree with some of the interpretations posted here.
To the person who posted that this song is about "religion:"
I disagree that it is about "religion" in the traditional sense of the word. I agree that it is about "religion" in the sense of the "religion" of psychiatry & the drug itself. I believe particularly the first verse refers in a rather cynical way to the way the pharmaceutical industry uses drugs to "fix" people. I love his apparent sarcasm here:
"I'm so happy 'cause today
I've found my friends ...
"Friends" = the pills themselves, the doctors who prescribe them. "Happy" = could also refer to how those with serious psychiatric disorders are often shunned, demonized, & misunderstood; so basically society & doctors prescribe pills to "fix" or "cure" those that don't fit in with society &/or cause disruption due to their mental illness. "Happiness" in our culture means being "normal" well-adjusted, self-sufficient human beings. On lithium, now one can be like all the "happy" people! A nice stab at a society that fears & looks down upon the mentally ill or basically anyone that rocks the boat in any manner. Nicely put in just one phrase Kurt!
"They're in my head
I'm so ugly, but that's okay, 'cause so are you..."
Similarly, "They're in my head" = Lithium is altering the chemicals in one's brain to "stabilize" the individual from such extreme highs & lows of Manic-Depression & it's symptoms. Look them up if you don't know them. I'm sure I'll mention them later. Some people already mentioned a few. "They're in my head" = Could also refer to the doctors prescribing the medication. Psychiatrists & therapists have a way of getting in their patients' heads by convincing them this is their only hope for surviving their mental illness (whether it's true & applicable to the individual or not.) Many with Bipolar Disorder & other psychiatric illnesses, such as Borderline Personality Disorder, which resembles & is often mistaken for Bipolar II disorder, especially with "rapid cycling" specified in the diagnosis. People with these disorders have high rates of suicide, medicated or not.
"I'm so ugly" = One sees him/herself as ugly not only because of the hopelessness & little or no self worth one experiences during Major Depressive episodes in particular, but also because society & doctors have told them so, directly or indirectly (see above.) One is perceived as "ugly" for the way they feel, act, or think as a result of their mental illness.
"but that's okay, 'cause so are you..."
He as the songwriter (and possible patient) recognizes the ugliness, but doesn't seem to mind "..that's okay" because he sees the ugliness in the "religion" of psychiatry & doctors that attempt to make him "well" with pills because without Lithium to tame Manic-Depressive symptoms one is unfit to live productively in this society. Those that judge the mentally ill, doctors or society in general, are just as if not more "ugly" than those that struggle with their mental illness. Intolerance is "ugly," which is society relies on psychiatric drugs like Lithium as a quick fix to these "derelicts" instead of really caring for mentally ill so they may live better lives & survive.
"We've broken our mirrors"
Reference most likely to mania, whether in Manic Episode or Mixed Episode. Broken mirrors could be literal & or metaphorical for self-hatred, inability to see oneself while in one of the above states, & broken relationships of any kind resulting from mental illness. "We" could simply refer to himself (or anyone in such a state), could refer to himself (or other subject) in conjunction with others if in reference to broken relationships. By the way all the technical references I'm making here I'm not saying Cobain was necessarily referring directly to or even thinking about when he wrote the song; ie: Manic vs. Mixed Episode etc. It's just additional information I'm relaying to readers.
"Sunday morning is everyday for all I care...
And I'm not scared"
This could have so many meanings. "Sunday morning" is considered a sacred or special day in some religions, such as Christianity. I think this is just expressing general apathy, whether it be apathy or emptiness one feels in a Depressive Episode, apathy induced by the Lithium that's dulls one's emotions, or apathy regarding any consequences to destructive behavior while manic. There could also be an expression of apathy to religion/Christianity itself. Not only an expression of being "not scared" of the consequences of his behavior on "Sunday" or any day, but being unafraid that any such behavior could send one (him) to hell, as many Christians believe.
"Light my candles in a daze..."
"Light my candles in a daze..." = Induce the euphoric symptoms that can go along with mania. Induce the state of mania in order to get out of the "daze," referring to depression &/or the dull, numbing effect many feel while taking Lithium. Ultimately, an expression of wanting to feel alive, "on fire," again. I would also gamble that it's another expression of his discontentment & cynicism with psychiatry, in the essence, that the Lithium has taken the spark out of life &/or they have failed to "cure" the depression & he (or the subject of the song) wants out it.
"'Cause I've found god - yeah, yeah, yeah"
This is likely a reference to the feeling of euphoria, being on top of the world, one with god, when manic. Associating this with the previous line, this interpretation makes the most sense because of the expression to feel the "high" part of mania that one misses when depressed or heavily medicated with Lithium & other psychiatric drugs.
"I've found god" could by a cynical/sarcastic reference to finding Lithium. Lithium being the "god" that is going to cure him.
"I'm so lonely but that's okay I shaved my head...
And I'm not sad
And just maybe I'm to blame for all I've heard...
But I'm not sure
I'm so excited, I can't wait to meet you there...
But I don't care
I'm so horny but that's okay...
My will is good - yeah, yeah, yeah"
This entire part of the song I think is just general apathy to being lonely or sad or to blame for anything, because during mania one doesn't necessarily think about the consequences to actions as long as one feels alive, not depressed, not dulled from Lithium. "I'm so excited, I can't wait to meet you there" - could be another reference to religion in the context of hell. Taunting those that will say he'll go to hell by saying he's excited, thus not caring what they think. And they'll go to hell too. He is also saying he has no shame for this being "horny" (also common during mania) & expression that he's a good person regardless, and thus not going to hell.
"I like it - I'm not gonna crack
I miss you - I'm not gonna crack
I love you - I'm not gonna crack
I kill you - I'm not gonna crack"
Not only is the "I" in here either Cobain himself (or another subject) that's suffering from Bipolar Disorder/Manic-Depression, but the "I" could also refer to the illness itself. He's expressing liking & loving the mania & missing the mania when it's gone due to Lithium or depression, all the while insisting that the mania or euphoria will not kill him, destroy him, or let it overpower him. It's a refusal to go back to the depression, the apathy & emptiness of being on Lithium or in a Depressive Episode. "I kill you - I'm not gonna crack" - I believe could refer to either he will kill the illness, beat the illness, even without Lithium. If the "I" in this sentence refers to Bipolar Disorder/Manic-Depression itself, it could be a statement of "I (this illness) will kill you & there's nothing you can do to stop it. For a stretch, the "I" could even be Lithium itself. The Lithium kills the spark of life, & being the intense (often with nasty side-effects) drug that it is, with it in one's system it's impossible to break through the hard shell or wall that the drug puts around the individual taking it. The Lithium is supposedly making one more stable in their mental illness, but simultaneously keeping them locked away from feeling emotions, the euphoria of mania, & even the feeling of "being" connected & present in the world.
So that's my stab at an interpretation. But that's what music's all about. The listener will make their own to fit their own experience. What Kurt Cobain meant by everything line by line will more than likely never be known. For all anyone knows maybe he wrote the lyrics in ten minutes without thinking all that much. It just is what it is, came out how it came out. He left us a great song & that's all that matters, no matter which way one interprets it. But no one but he will ever know exactly what was going on in his mind at the exact moment the words came out of his head. That's kind of a given for any, well, most artists. But for whatever reason he needed to write it at that moment in time. I hope it made him feel better, to get it out, even if just for a little while...
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